Anyways, yeah this week has been great. Yesterday I had the time of my life. I will be going off on a little rant here just because I have to get it out. After I came home from Summer Fest, I went to check my Facebook and well was shocked when somebody messaged me, I could already tell they were upset with me. See at my school we had ballroom tryouts and the ballroom coach had told me that a certain person wasn't going to make team, I didn't tell this person because I didn't want to hurt them. I did tell my friend though and possibly two other people could have heard because they were in the room at the same time. I don't know if they heard, but still. He found out that I knew something about why he didn't make team and was upset for telling my friend. Well this person that didn't make team, got really mad at my friend earlier too (the one I had told about the ballroom secret thing). This isn't just any friend of mine though, she's my best friend. This guy that didn't make ballroom team was saying stuff to my best friend and really it was uncalled for. I understand that she said things too, but it doesn't give him any right to tell me and her what she deserves. Like I've said before, we aren't here to judge people, we can judge their works, but not their personality. Everybody is different, everybody has a reason to why they are the way they are and that doesn't give you the right to tear them apart about it. Not only was he saying stuff about my best friend, he was saying stuff about me, and Andrew. Yes, I'm upset at the things he said to me, but really I'm more upset that he finds it okay to call people names, say stuff about two of the most important people in my life. I don't care if you call me names, threaten me, whatever, but when it comes to my friends you can bet I'll do something about it. They don't deserve it at all. Maybe I do, but no, you don't have to bring them into it. And threatening people isn't right either. I don't care who you are, but really it's not. It's rude, disrespectful and NOBODY should be threatened or blackmailed. I'm tired of people acting like they like me or whatever, I don't need your pity. I need real friends, real people. Being fake hurts not only you but others. I know. I've been there. I used to act fake myself. I hated it, and I'm ashamed of the way I was. I was rude to some people who meant a lot to me and I hurt a lot of people. I hurt myself. There is no reward in being fake. You can only lose. You lose some friends, and a lot more. I know and like I said, I really am ashamed of how I was when I acted like a fake.
Sorry but this part I will say is directed towards a specific person:
People don't need other people who are just going to be rude to others. I don't need to hear from people that you think I'm heartless, or that I don't care about other people's feelings. You have no idea what I've had to go through. My life has not been easy, and I don't expect it to be, but I don't need people reminding me I'm not perfect. I hardly think highly of myself. I already know I'm not the best. I already know I have faults and I don't need people who are just going to keep pointing them out. I'm sorry we can't all be as perfect as you. I'm sorry I didn't "care" as much as you wanted me to. You can't force how I feel. I am my own person. I'm not perfect. I fail, a lot. I'm not confident in my talents...I hardly even call them talents. I hate having people ask me what my talents are because I feel like I'm not that talented. I may not be the best person, but yes I do care about people. I care about people because even though I was fake once and was a HUGE jerk, I still had people who would care about me and love me anyways. They are the reason why I'm still here. They kept me going. I want to pay them back by doing the same for others. I hate seeing people make fun of others or say things about other people they don't even know at all. I hate it. I may not agree with what everybody does, but I don't know what they are going through and I can't just judge them personally. That is not my job, and it's not yours either. Stop judging people. It's rude, and it's pointless. You lose chances by judging others. I've learned that myself. One of my best friends, if I had judged them the way you have judged me I would have never had her as my friend. Like I've said to you, I'm not perfect, but I try. I try to be better than I was the day before. I try to go through life happier than how I really feel. I try to include others. I try. And you telling me and pointing out my flaws, that's not helping. It won't help you and it's not going to help me. People don't need to hear that you think they aren't perfect. There is a better way to help them strive to be a better person. Pointing out flaws is not one of them!
Okay, sorry...I know this is a very personal post but I really had to get it out there. Like I said this week has been great. I only had just one rough spot and you know even though it was bad, I'm okay. I know who my real friends are. I know my strengths and I know what I can handle. As hurt as I was to hear you try to blackmail me, I'm not going to let it take over me. I have better things to do. I have a life and I'm trying to live it. Once again, I know this was a very personal post, but I really can't just keep this inside. Thanks for reading it, and please do not treat others the way you think they deserve to be treated. Just treat them kindly, treat them better than you want to be treated. You don't have to like what they do, but you should still respect them. Just treat them nice, be a friend still. I want to just real quick thank those in my life that have done just that. Those who have stuck with me even with all my faults. Those who have lifted me, those who have helped me feel better, and those who have been a friend when I've needed one most. You all are amazing and I feel like I'm in debt to you guys. Thank you for being a person I can rely on. :)
Woot! Go lissa! You're great and don't let anybody say otherwise! :D
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