Wow, this is my last letter I'll be writing for my challenge. There are many more I could write to and I have so much to say to each of you! Thank you all for being great friends! I love you all! It's been great writing these letters, they have had me look back and think about all the great times! I have had 24 days of reminiscing, and that's been so great! You also get to know a little more about me through these letters, which I find pretty neat. Thank you all for everything! Today's letter is going to be different than all the letters I wrote. Thank you all, once again for everything! Love you all..
08/16/12
Dear Heavenly Father,
Wow, this is so different writing this. I don't know where I should begin. There is a lot I could say. Heavenly Father, thank you so much for everything. Really, you have been there for me everyday. Even when I didn't think you were, I now realize you were and you always will be. I feel awful because of how I turned away from you. I really have never felt so empty before. I'm so grateful that I took seminary and you had given me a friend I needed to help me realize you were there. Just looking back at that time in my life, it really does hurt me to see how lost I was, and how confused I was. I do remember, I had no testimony at one point, and it hurt to hear people tell me that they thought I was so strong in the church because I didn't feel like it, because I didn't believe it. I have now gained my own testimony and I know you are always there for me. "I have learned for myself."
With Jeremy and that whole thing, I remember one night I just broke down. I really didn't know what to do and I prayed so hard that night. I remember asking to have peace and comfort and I just remember feeling as if somebody was hugging me and telling me things were going to be okay. I have never felt like that before, and it was incredible. And then talking with Jeremy's grandfather. I know you had him say what I needed to hear that night.
Heavenly Father, I know you have helped me so much this year. I have such a strong testimony that you are there always, and that prayers are answered. When things got really rough this summer with an old friend, it was through your help that I was able to just forgive and move on. I can't believe the peace I had that morning when I woke up and had truly forgiven. I know it was because of you, I had tried on my own but couldn't seem to forgive, but once I asked for your help, it came easier. It was incredible.
I can't thank you enough for always listening. You know me more than I even know myself. You have been with me through EVERYTHING. You've been there the nights where I cried myself to sleep, the days that were the best days of my life, you've been there when I was sick, everything. You are constantly there and there aren't words to describe how grateful I am.
I remember at girl's camp, my third year. I had been dehydrated and I was really sick. The priesthood men gave me a blessing that night. I don't remember what they said, but not all of it was for me to feel better. I remember the feeling I had. The spirit was so incredibly strong. I couldn't believe it.
I also remember just this past year, when things were just getting to be too much for me. I was trying to fix things and I felt like I was failing. I needed a blessing, and when I finally got one, I couldn't believe, once again, how strong I could feel the spirit. The guy who was giving me the blessing, he hardly knew me, yet what he said was exactly what I needed to hear and I know it came from you. I think that moment was one of the times I have felt the spirit the strongest. Words cannot describe that feeling I had. I felt so comforted, and loved and I knew you were there for me. I have no doubt in my mind, you are there. I can't even begin to tell you how strong my testimony is of that. I just know, for myself, you are there for me.
You know me more than anybody else does. You know my strengths, and you know my weaknesses. After all, you are my Father. I know that you give me trials that you know I can handle and I know they will make me stronger. I've been through a lot this past year, as you know and I know it was all for the better. It has made me a better person and I have become stronger because of it. I've grown up a lot because of the trails I have had this past year. I have learned a lot.
Heavenly Father, thank you so much for always being there for me. Really, thank you. I know I keep saying it, but I really just can't tell you enough, thank you! I do know you care and I know you are doing what's best for me. Looking back, I really do feel so bad that I turned away from you. I can't believe how much I had forgotten. I forgot who I was and I feel awful that I forgot you. I am so grateful to have you in my life. I really don't know what I would do without you. You know how I like to try and fix things on my own, but I have learned that I can't. I can't always do things by myself, and that I do need your help. I have learned to ask for your help. I know I can always count on you.
I hope you know that you really do mean a lot to me. Even though life has been crazy and it always changes, you are always constant. Thank you for teaching me so much throughout my life. Thank you so much for being there for me over 16 years now. Most of all thank you for your love. I don't know who I would be if it wasn't for you. I seriously can't imagine it. I love you and you mean so much to me. Thank you for always guiding me, and helping me be a better person. I really do want to make you proud. I really do try my best and I know you know that. I can't thank you enough. I know you are watching over me, and like I keep saying, I know you are always there. Thank you for giving me everything I have. I am so blessed. I can't thank you enough for the friends I have, I am truly blessed to have them in my life.
I feel so lucky. At times, I feel like I don't deserve things, and that other people deserve them, but I want to thank you for giving me what I have. I really am grateful for everything, even the little things. I know that my testimony actually started to grow from the simple little things because I had to start small. Thank you. I really do hope of making you proud, my Father in Heaven. I love you so very much. Thank you, once again, for everything.
Your daughter,
Alissa A'Lynn Lopez ♥
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